Forgive me,

For all the lack

I fear.

For all the wants

I raise

Up

Above

You.

 

Forgive me,

For all the idols

Of time,

People,

Places,

Things,

I choose to worship

Before,

And instead,

Of You.

 

Forgive me for assuming

The worst of Your character,

A stingy, killjoy God,

Who likes to withhold,

To see what I’ll do,

To see if I’ll break.

That’s not You.

 

Forgive me for creating

Idealistic scenarios,

Castles in the sky

Where I imagine

My happiness lies,

Instead of seeking first

You.

I fear scarcity.

Don’t we all?

Isn’t this life

Like an anthill,

One mad rush

To make sure

We will be safe,

We will have enough,

Be enough,

Get enough.

 

I fear the not enough.

I fear the missing out.

Being left out.

Being passed in some race

I never signed up for.

I fear not becoming

All I can and should be.

Not making the most

Of all I’ve been given.

As if it’s all

Up to me.

 

I count the “I’s” and “me’s” above.

And I ask for mercy.

 

“Satan loves it when we focus on what we don’t have,

what God hasn’t done for us,

or how God has seemingly let us down.

Satan is the original killjoy,” ~ Ann Peterson ~

 

 

“Contentment comes from having the right priority-

godliness, not gain;

and the right perspective –

the eternal,

not the temporal,” ~Stephen J. Cole~

 

 

“Seek first His kingdom

and His righteousness,

and all these things

will be given to you as well,”

Matthew 6:33

 

Keep company with God,

Get in on the best.

Ps. 37:4 The Message

 

I was biking and it hit me.

The missing key.

Contentment is something I strive for

Unless I have this key.

Belief.

Do I believe that all along,

Thus far,

God, a good, caring Father,

Has guided me

By His Spirit?

Belief.

Do I believe

That where I am,

Who I am,

What I do,

Has been directed

Through a constant relationship

With the One who knows best?

The mind controlled by the Spirit

Is life and peace.

Have I been led

By life?

By peace?

Do I believe that

my fathers and mothers of the faith,

Have heard, believed, voiced,

Their assurance

of my place,

My identity,

My purpose,

Here now?

Can I believe

That maybe

It’s not all up to me?

 

 

I believe in Sovereignty,

And free will,

And I love the beautiful

Mystery of how

They blend together

From our perspective,

Down here.

I wonder what it all looks like,

From Your view,

God.

 

“If you make God the utmost delight and pleasure of your life,

He will provide for you what you desire the most.

Give God the right to direct your life

And as you trust Him along the way,

You’ll find He pulled it off perfectly!”

Psalm 37: 4-5 TPT

 

 

Fear is a place I don’t trust You.

A place I don’t believe.

 

Love, starve the fear out of me.

Love, starve scarcity.

Out of every pore,

Of every thought,

Of every heart-beat,

Of my very being.

Root and ground me

In a Love that covers,

Protects,

Provides,

Assures,

Releases,

Slows,

Guides,

Gives,

Life and peace,

Faith, to believe,

His Kingdom,

First,

The eternal,

The godly,

Over the temporal,

Over the gain,

Love of Christ,

Ground me.

Direct me.

This whole life,

My sacrifice,

Me.

Pull it off

Perfectly.

Cause this is what You

Have been known,

Over and over,

to do.

“We know that in all things

God works for the good

Of those who love Him,

Who have been called

According to His purpose,”

Romans 8:28

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

1. Peterson, Anne. Finding Contentment by Killing Comparisons. Christianity Today .
2. Cole, Steven J. Perscription for Contentment. Bible.org.

Message, Matt. 6: